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        Smilez  58, Female, Ohio, USA - 271 entries
    22
    Feb 2007
    2:41 AM EST
       

    I didnt do anything but talk to another guy.. just talk. Was it 2 minutes, maybe three.. but it was just talk.

    Did I like the embrace? Sure why not.. its been so long since I've had a real good hug.

    Did it mean anything to me? I cant say it did.

    All I did was mention 1 guy that scared me that I could become attractive to, and it remains my down fall and the initical down fall to mine and his relationship.

    I set him free last night, he set me free. No more knowing that he'll call me and we will still cling on the phone with each other. We hung up this time.

    What is the griving period in letting ones heart heal? I dont know, I guess I'll find out in due time.

    He just wants to be himself now.. I had no idea I was trying to change him, I was always fussing at him, and I was always talking about other guys to him.

    I use to think him and I were so compatiable so perfect together.

    After these last few talks I can see he's not.

    What was he to me...? My best friend.

    Who does he think about now? Her.. and what could be or will be between them? Their so much alike, and him and I arent.

    All I did was love this man unconditional. Over looking his faults, lies, and secrets.

    I had hoped for so much more with him. But sometimes when you love someone as much as you do... you have to set him free... Like he sang the other night to me on the phone... IM FREE ... yeah baby you are!

    I just wonder if and when you do go to prision, which one of us will you be thinking about?

    I guess I'll never know.

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        x3VanDyke  34, Female, Pennsylvania, USA - 24 entries
    22
    Feb 2007
    3:03 PM EDT
       

    Hey Y'all I wasn't able to get on here yesterday soo whateverrr&&anyway My weekend sucked DIDNT DO ANYTHING! Grr i had my cell today and oh yeah Chris isn't being an asshole to me anymore=) but whateverr.. Im soo boredd! anyway gotta go ttyl byez



    Love Dal
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        ladybugmama06  40, Female, Arizona, USA - 4 entries
    22
    Feb 2007
    11:24 AM EDT
       

    It been 10 years that my cousin giving me a really hard times and getting me depressed. She always think that she is the boss of me but she is not. She think im stupid cause i am hard hearing (deaf) but im not stupid, im smart for not doing something stupid like she did. She is pregnany and I don't think she is doing the right thing cause she is still dying her hair which is bad for the baby and her behavior isn't so good either. She is always jealous of me for some reason and she doesn't need to be so damn jealous of me. I got my own life and she got her damn life. She got husband who is also in the iraq right now and she carried their first baby. I got a beautiful son and im also single mother which is i am really happy about. I hate seeing myself getting hurt by her. I hate being hurt and depressed. It is time for her to stay out of my business and my life for now on! I wish I have something to talk about my life and stuff but i got my mom!
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        TAC122  38, Female, Washington, USA - First entry!
    21
    Feb 2007
    10:49 PM EDT
       

    today my mom told me that she might have cancer in her overies. This scares the shit out of me. i dont know what i will do if she has it and if she dies. i hope that when they do sugery its just a growth. I already had a shaky faith and wasnt sure if there even is a god. But this, if she has cancer then i think that god doesnt excist. my mom is so unselfish. she would do anything for me and my family. she deserves the best. i love her so much. she has so much faith in everything she has this journal and today i read some of the things and she writes to god and the last thing she wrote was that she is praying for me and my sisters future husbands and that i got thanksgiving off from work and she is so amazing just the little things like that i just cant believe that she would pray for. if i lost my mom i dont know what i would do. who would i talk to about everything that happend at school? or my problems w/ my boyfriend. or watch scary movies w/. my mom is so beautiful to me i love her.
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    1 comment(s) - 08:11 PM - 03/01/2007
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        Journal4Jackson  49, Female, California, USA - 48 entries
    22
    Feb 2007
    6:31 AM PST
       

    2/22/07-Woke up at normal time, freeplayed until breakfast. Ate breakfast well, cleaned up and played cars at the table. Then played fishing game and bingo at the table for 15 min each. Got down, got dressed/ready for day and then played in living room. Did sports game (baseball,basketball) for about 10 minutes. Then set up a "fort" (old baby corral) and played blocks inside it for about 20 min. Then had lunch, ate well. Read books and freeplayed until it was time to leave for OT. Came home from OT, went down for nap and SLEPT for about an hour or so. Got up, did Thomas trains in living room followed by lacing beads on the floor (tummy time). Had dinner, ate well. Went and played carsin the corral again and then played with Dad after he got home. Cleaned up, bedtime routine and went to bed at normal time. Fell asleep within 45 minutes. Total TV for day: None. Total TO's for day: 3. Brushed every 3 hours w/o problems.

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        shirleyxu  54, Female, China - 301 entries
    23
    Feb 2007
    1:18 AM EST
       

    俺爹 2007年2月22日 （大年初五） 英逵 俺爹这辈子戎马生涯，在他的身后，曾经有无数英烈倒下。我 敬重俺爹，经过，抗日的烽火，内战的血雨加上文革的劫 难，，他仍能活得有信仰，有情趣。俺爹离开我们四年多了， 每逢佳节倍思亲，多年来，他老人家慈祥的笑脸一直在我心 中，伴我走过日日夜夜，儿时的往事，一幕幕，仿佛就在昨 天。 零岁时，俺娘在北京的育鹏小学当老师，要住校。俺爹用奶瓶 喂俺喂了半年。这半年的喂奶，让俺拥有了我家别的孩子没有 的特权，我可以与爹争论，俺爹从不会生气。 四岁时，在长春，有回，爹给俺洗手，他的那拿枪的大手两下 就把我的小姆指的手指甲搓掉了，好在不疼，很快就又长出来 新指甲。四十年过去了，我仍记得爹那双长满老茧的大手的温 暖。 五岁时，爹给俺讲的故事是狮身人面的典故。使今天的俺能在 大学里教书，以‘卖嘴皮’为生。 六岁上，爹教俺骑自行车。之后的俺，学滑冰只用三个小时， 学风帆也只用半天。 七岁时，爹手把手地教俺书法，直至今天，俺还以‘画家’的风 雅自居。 八岁时，在长春，爹给俺一间屋，让俺当了十二只猫的猫主。 经历了猫的生老病死，俺对生命有了认识，从此俺知道怎样去 爱。 九岁时，在大连金州干校，爹带俺上山护果林，喂猪，喂牛， 有一次爹喂的几十头牛胜利大逃亡，俺和俺哥去追，沟沟坎 坎，俺跌倒了无数次，天黑之前，俺为爹追回了五头牛。之后 的俺知道吃苦付出和不轻易放弃。 十岁是小妮子最爱美的年龄，爹出差沈阳带回了一件连衣裙， 惊喜过望的俺穿上连衣裙，认为自己是全锦州城最漂亮的女 孩。爹给了俺难得的自信。让俺今天还误认为自己最美。一个 人外表美不美并不太重要，关键是要自己觉得自己美。 十三岁，爹给俺买了第一个吉他，让音乐永远滋润我的灵魂。 十六岁上，俺上了大学，夏天，爹把辛苦收获的西红柿和黄瓜 放在地窖里，留着等俺暑假回来吃。那清香至今留在俺的口 中。十几年来，不论俺身处那个国度，俺会千里万里携家带口 赶回家，为的是听爹娘的乡音，看爹娘的笑脸。 我没为爹做过啥，唯一做到的事，用小脚板走天涯，将足迹踏 遍世界各地，告诉俺爹，他的闺女不孬。 今年的大年三十，儿子进姥姥家的第一件事，是在老爷的灵前 燃起三炷香，跪在地上说：“老爷，我回家来看您了”。爹在天 之灵会看到，他给我的涓涓父爱，全部传给了他的外孙。孩子 虽小，但他知道，没有天哪有地？没有你哪有我？
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        lifesux07  35, Female, New York, USA - 2 entries
    21
    Feb 2007
    8:40 PM EDT
       

    For about two months now I have had a house full....and not in a good way either....my sister got her kids taken away so my mom took them in. It was the right thing to do, but it screwed up our whole lives. At first it was just me,my mom, and my sister. Now it's me,my mom,my sister,my other sister,my other sister,her daughter,and my other sisters two boys. A lot of people living in a four bedroom house. Everyone has a bed to sleep in a bathroom to shower in and a place to relax. But no one ever gets to anymore. I love my sister to death but she fucked up herlife and took ours with her. I'm not being selfish and i'm not being mean. She finally got visitation the other week so shes been here to help. The thing is she hasnt changed, she still sits on the phone or the computer and lets her son rome around. She has court again on the 12th, but we dont even think shes ready to have them back yet. Today she was supposed to be here at 12:30 so my mom could take me to go get my permit, i've been looking foward to today for the past week, she decides that shes gonna be late. I didnt go get it...my mom had to be to work at 2 and we werent gonna have enogh time for me to get it done. So now once again my sister got to do what ever she felt she wanted and not care about anyone else. I have barely any social life anymore cause noone has the time to bring me anywhere. On top of all that my boyfriend of 2 years decided to dump me when i needed him the most. People can say that it's not that bad...and i know theres people out there that have it a lot worse then i do...but, i just want things to go back to the way they were.



    Thanks For Listening

    Lifesux
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        unknown  35, Female, Canada - 3 entries
    21
    Feb 2007
    6:43 PM EST
       

    ok so i just found out that the person i love to death n will love more then anyone else ever, likes me alot too. the thing is tho is that we can never be together becuz it wouldnt be accepted in either of our families, in our school, or even with our friends. they would all look down on us and treat us differently, it would NEVER be the same again. i dont care tho i love this person n they love me i dont care wut anyone else says about it. if its truely meant to be then it will work out between us and no one can say anything to make me change my mind. I LOVE HER and there is nothing anyone can do about it.




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        unknown  35, Female, Canada - 3 entries
    21
    Feb 2007
    6:35 PM EST
       

    Your perfect little girl dropped a grade on her report card.
    Your perfect little girl yelled at you last night.
    Your perfect little girl talked back to you again.
    Your perfect little girl painted her nails black.
    Your perfect little girl lied to you all her life.
    Your perfect little girl cries herself to sleep.
    Your perfect little girl slits her wrists ‘till she bleeds.
    Your perfect little girl dated before sixteen.
    Your perfect little girl was broken by a boy.
    Your perfect little girl doesn’t go to church.
    Your perfect little girl hates you.
    Your perfect little girl has given up on life.
    Your perfect little girl had a tantrum today.
    Your perfect little girl wants to run away.
    Your perfect little girl thinks she’s overweight.
    Your perfect little girl hasn’t let you dry her tears.
    Your perfect little girl disobeys you.
    Your perfect little girl hates the world.
    Your perfect little girl is hated by the world.
    Your perfect little girl says bad things about you.
    Your perfect little girl is very unhappy.
    Your perfect little girl questions her sexuality.
    Your perfect little girl tried to commit suicide.
    Your perfect little girl has become a disgrace.
    Your perfect little girl... isn't so perfect anymore.



    This may jus be a poem that sum1 created because they were angry or sumthing, but it describes my life perfectly. Not just sum of the poem, but the whole thing, cuz its all true about me.
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        martytx07  37, Male, Texas, USA - 53 entries
    21
    Feb 2007
    5:09 PM CST
       

    Well today was sort of disappointing because I had a psychology test on Monday and I thought I was going to do well on it but it turned out that I just freaking bombed it. I got a 60...so yeah, that really sucked. I did some mediation for it for it can go up to a 70. I really think that class is interesting but I'm not good enough for it...it's somewhat discouraging but I know I can pull through. Well that's it for now. Yay, my second post!
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